A Perfume Wishlist

So I started buying perfumes again after buying one in the duty free section on my recent travels. I am a bit tight when it comes to money so I have found some bargain sites that sell my favourites at great prices.

The dilemma!

What one do I purchase next.

I have been doing the rounds and sampling so great perfumes. I have also found my taste has changed since I last bought a lot of perfume. I will however never get over Dior Addict 2.

To put my predicament into perspective I have made a wishlist of perfumes I wish to buy.  

Here is the complete list:

SALVATORE FERRAGAMO

SIGNORINA 50ml EAU DE PARFUM BY SALVATORE FERRAGAMO    

GUCCI

ENVY ME 50ml EAU DE TOILETTE BY GUCCI  

FLORA 50ml EAU DE TOILETTE BY GUCCI 

COACH

COACH POPPY FLOWER 50ml EAU DE PARFUM BY COACH

GUESS

GUESS SEDUCTIVE 75ml EAU DE TOILETTE BY GUESS

MARC JACOBS

HONEY 100ml EAU DE PARFUM BY MARC JACOBS  

OH LOLA! 100ml EAU DE PARFUM BY MARC JACOBS    

OH LOLA! SUNSHEER 50ml EAU DE PARFUM BY MARC JACOBS 

PRADA

CANDY L'EAU 50ml EAU DE TOILETTE BY PRADA

PRADA MILANO INFUSION D'IRIS ABSOLU FLEUR D'ORANGER 50ml EAU DE PARFUM BY PRADA

VERSACE

BRIGHT CRYSTAL 50ml EAU DE TOILETTE BY VERSACE 

YSL

ELLE INTENSE 50ml EAU DE PARFUM BY YVES SAINT LAURENT          

PARISIENNE 50ml EAU DE PARFUM BY YVES SAINT LAURENT

Yes, that is over 1k in perfume. So no, I won't be purchasing all of it.

Help me out. Which one would you buy?

A quick guide to pattern names

I love patterns.

I love ethnic patterns the most. In my recent trip to India I was in pattern heaven.

Alas I am no longer in India surrounded by intricate design. I do however enjoy seeing patterns in decor. The only problem is I didn't know the names of these patterns..... until now. Here is a quick guide to my favourites.

Argyle

Houndstooth

Chevron

Moroccan

Demask

Fleur De Lis

Paisley

Quatrefoil

Fret

Trellis

Ikat

So there you have it. What are your favourite patterns?

In Focus: Modesty Wear

So I have been watching Modesty Wear on Facebook for some time. Since I have huge insecurities about my arms I have always been drawn to a batwing or butterfly abaya. That is why Modesty Wear caught my attention. They do an abaya/dress that uses the design but in colours and material that is so versatile it can be worn at any occasion


They have the batwing abaya that comes with a material belt that you can choose to wear.... or not.

For a little more dressy option, you can get a chiffon dress. Chiffon is very elegant and takes very little to make the dress a formal piece.

The also do skirts in every colour of the rainbow. They look so feminine with the bow at the front and can be dressed up or down depending on the occasion.

But my favourite is the jumpsuit dress. If I could I would get every colour and pattern. I would live in them for the rest of my life!

They do these comfy looking cardigans too!

Modesty wear is extremely feminine and modest. They design pieces that are versatile and can be worn all year round.

I think it's time I purchased some pieces of my own..... problem is.... which ones?

We all grieve differently

"I'm fine". It's what I said when my beloved grandmother passed away. I felt that in my heart I was ok. I had felt at ease knowing she was not suffering anymore. I felt at ease I had said my goodbyes the night before her passing. I had convinced myself and was struggling to convince my family I was strong and that I could get up and ream a poem dedicated to her at her funeral. Truth was, I could do that. In fact I was strong enough to hide most of my emotions. But is that strength?

I had shared a very close bond with my grandmother. Joy was her name and she lived up to it in every way. She was my baby sitter when I was younger and my partner in crime as I got older. She was my comfort, companion and someone I cherished. She filled in such a large part of my life. Her love saw no bounds and she treated me no different when I converted to Islam 3 years ago.

It was my faith that had convinced me of her being at peace. "Believe in God, and do good deeds" is something essential in my belief in order to enter heaven and I found my grandmother was the epitome of this. My belief was what made me convince myself I was fine and how I became the rock who rarely cried despite being so close to her. What surprised me months later was that I was not so strong.



Believe it or not, I have never had anyone close to me pass away. I have never had someone who formed a huge part of my past and present leave my life. I was not used to the thought of death. That is what changed me. I started to focus on death. My mind dwelled on it. I thought about it almost every day. How can people just go?

My faith tells me their souls go to heaven and that is what I believe but I am still left with that emptiness.

At the same time as my grandmothers passing, my cousin had attempted suicide and was in a critical condition. Soon after her funeral, he too passed. His grandmother, sister in law to my grandmother, had lost her grandson and best friend in a couple of weeks. Sadly she too passed this month and like before I held it together.

But here is where I fall apart....

When people get on with life and just think lovingly of the person, I focus on the death. I focus on the ending and have a nauseating feeling of emptiness. My thoughts have become dark and I have changed in my outlook and behaviour. I have become snappy. I have become detached. I have not been able to return to my family home since my grandmothers funeral. Why? Because death is there and I am afraid of it. I don't even know why I am afraid.

All I know is that I am still grieving and I still get upset in my own way. Sometime I wish I could cry because at least people would still see I am grieving. But I don't and many are just left with a sometimes detached, sometimes irrational, sometimes lost woman.

Muslim women and the fashion drought

As any Muslim woman can and probably will tell you, buying clothes in Australia if you are a Muslim woman is quite difficult. We don't have a thriving Muslim fashion market in my city and the handful of shops selling Muslim clothing lines are either in one style or heavily marked up. I don't want to pay in the hundreds for an abaya.

When you mention it to people you are often met with responses suggesting you wait for the western clothing lines to put out a maxi dress or you should purchase when you travel overseas. What they don't understand is many of us are not born overseas and don't regularly travel overseas to Muslim majority nations.

What we are left to do is a bit of online shopping that involves a lottery pick in the size, fit and quality stakes. Deprived are we of the ability to go out and sort through the myriad of dresses, trying on and asking a million times if we look good in this. We miss out on the thrill and our husbands, fathers, brothers, don't have any idea how disappointed we are.

If you have a husband like mine who is appearance concerned and spends a whole day in the shopping malls trying to stock his wardrobe then you would understand my frustration dragged along on his quests. I get to the mall and walk out often empty handed. He walks out with four to five bags. He often asks why I never purchased anything and I'm dumbstruck. Do men not realise that between the short shorts and skinny jeans, there isn't a vast supply of suitable Muslimah clothing? That when we look at handbags and they worry we have an obsession, it's really just because we have nothing else to look at? Unless we are stocking our wardrobe with around the house clothing items we really have little to do with the mall and that disappoints me as it brought me so much fun when I was younger.

Alas, not all is lost. I have managed to become an excellent online shopper and built a small list of great Aussie brands that ship to where I live. Not exactly the same but it's something.

No Baby Bonus, No more baby plans.

Where do I go from now?

We live on a single income. We live this way because I am raising my son. I do not complain much about our financial situation as it’s just the three of us and we get by. I had taken maternity leave when I gave birth to my son and I enjoyed the financial stability for the few months I received it.

The maternity leave allowed me to ease into the financial strain of having a baby. We did not live lavishly but we were able to afford the most important items like the pram and a nursery. The funds were put to good use.

We made plans soon after the birth of my son to wait 2 years before having the next one. In the meantime I could stay home and raise my son because returning to work would mean I wouldn’t get to cherish those early days and what was the point if I wanted to fall pregnant so soon?

Our financial cushion, the Baby Bonus, would give us the need finances and peace of mind when number two came along. Unfortunately that bonus has been scrapped now and our plan to have a family with two children close together is looking bleak. I am heartbroken and confused.

So I am feeling a little ripped off to say the least. In fact a family like mine who is living of one income whilst I raise my baby is now unable to receive any financial help if they decided to expand. On the other hand, in a two-income family the mother will receive for 4.5 months a minimum wage.

I am not your dole bludger. I receive only the tax benefit and not the full amount.  I have just planned to have a block of my life set aside for babies and the rest set aside for my career.

What are my options if I don’t receive a baby bonus that significantly helps my one income family? Get a job, work three months, fall pregnant, and quit after eight? Not only does that really impact my career (it looks irresponsible), it’s also a pain in the backside for my employer. Essentially they would be getting used for the Paid Parental Leave.

But this is my option now. I can’t afford another child on a single income. We have dreams and we are not so young anymore to not think about our financial future. So those who think that scrapping the baby bonus gets rid of irresponsible parents then think again. It affects people’s life plans. If I had known it would have been scrapped, I would have had my second earlier. I may have returned to work already. Arguing that removing the baby bonus is okay because we have paid parental leave does not help the women who are stay at home mums or women dedicating a time out for children.

We all have our plans and tonight mine has just been threatened. I just have to remember God is a better planner and he already has his plans for me.

I cried for her

I am a Muslim woman and most people have already made assumptions about me before even meeting me. Some think I do not respect the culture and law of my country, Australia. Why? Because of how I dress, act, and sometimes the way I remove myself from certain parts of society. Ironically, I was born as an Aussie and so were my great great great grandparents. 


As a Muslim in Australia, I am often referenced for being a metaphorical slap in the face to Australian culture. I am often referred to being someone who wants to change the Australian Law and ruin Christmas. Laughable to many, this constant painting of Muslims as rather antisocial citizens who want to ruin everything kind of gets on my nerves. It's slightly annoying and more often than not upsetting. It's always "US" and "THEM". 


Despite being referred to as "THEM", I still feel Australian. I am still a part of this country and take a large interest in its current affairs. I took particular interest in the story of 31-year-old Alicia Gali who was sentenced to jail for being raped in Dubai. You can read the story here: Mamamia Article. Essentially she reported the rape to police and in doing so admitted consuming alcohol and having premarital sex (through rape!). She was sentenced to 12 months jail but was pardoned after 8 months. 

I know I can repeat what many Aussies say when discussing the burqa or anything to do with the way Muslims live in this country. I can stoop real low and say "If you come here you then need to obey the laws and follow the culture". But in reality that is not how I feel. I find a lot of hypocrisy in the UAE. I find the law in the case of rape a severe injustice to victims of sexual crimes. I feel that if you allow alcohol to be served in hotels in your country then you can't punish people for drinking in those hotels. But wait…. I am a Muslim and yes I do live my life in accordance to Sharia (it’s more a lifestyle than a law). But I am human and I acknowledge that sexual crimes against women are too prevalent in this world. I feel am I a part of a larger sisterhood and it hurts me when women are victims of sexual crimes and are treated as criminals. 

Jill Meagher was sadly a victim of a sexual crime.

It baffles me that the law has not evolved to include advance technology such as rape kits in determining rape. The UAE needs to use logic in rape cases as well as treating the case with sensitivity and compassion. As these laws are essentially Islamic we must not to forget that as Muslims we are taught to protect women and the treat women kindly with compassion and mercy. Maybe UAE enact these virtues by changing there laws to include rape kits as evidence.


I know that despite writing this I will still receive comments regarding Muslim men as oppressors of women and that Muslims do not respect Australian Law.  But I hope… I hope this makes people wonder whether the world is “US” and “THEM” or rather just “US”, humanity.


May Alicia find peace and healing in this life and comfort from the ones she loves.

Sisters' House helped me find myself

Alhumdulillah, I became a Muslim in early 2010. Before and shortly after becoming Muslim I always felt as though I did not fit in. I had very little confidence and held back in most situations. After becoming a Muslim I also had the same worries many new Muslims faced, the lack of support and the alienation of those who did not accept my choices.

After getting married in late 2010 I moved to Kuraby knowing very little of the area except for the masjid. I had felt extremely lonely but that all changed when someone referred me onto a wonderful organisation called Sisters House. At first I came to meet other sisters through the Revert Support Group and then I attended more and more community functions.

Sisters’ House gave me a place to feel comfortable and find like-minded sisters. We shared our experiences and supported each other through various life experiences. It was the first time I felt connected so closely to so many people; people from all over the world who treated each and every sister equally.

Recently Sisters’ House held a fundraising dinner to raise the much-needed funds that had depleted after moving to a new location. Sisters’ House endeavours to hold two major events annually with the fundraising dinner held at Michaels Oriental being the main event and opportunity to raise the funds Sisters’ House desperately relies on.

The Sisters’ House committee of volunteers worked tirelessly to organise the event. Their efforts provided a night filled with a delicious dinner, games and a charity auction in which donated items from various local businesses were auctioned off. Sisters’ House would like to thank all those businesses who donated items to the auction as the auction raised much need funds for Sisters’ House.

Not long ago I was invited to become a member of the Sisters’ House committee as a volunteer. I jumped at the chance because I wanted to give back to the Sisters’ House.  Sisters’ House provides more than accommodation but it’s also a place where all sisters are welcome and a place we can all meet in a comfortable and safe environment. Sisters’ House has an atmosphere inviting to everyone and for me personally it has allowed me to become the person I want to be. That is why it is essential that our community support Sisters’ House so that it can continue to be an important part of the community.